Wasting every chance.

I am currently wasting every chance for me to talk to him. The first chance was when my chubby buddy handed me a shirt from Clyde. Along with it was a note saying why he can't give it personally. It was dismissal time when this happened. I planned to thank him face to face [I thought he was going to train that day.] Then I saw that he wasn't so after training, I went home and texted him. I dunno if he received it or not.

The second chance was...today. Because yesterday night, I was chatting with him when my brother came home from school. As usual, my brother would tell me to get off the computer. So yeah, my brother was sitting beside me. Then I told Clyde that I needed to go because it was my brother's turn on the computer. Then he said 143 then ily. I IMMEDIATELY signed my YM out for fear that my brother would see it. I don't think my brother saw it though, because he didn't react to anything. Because usually, he would react and stuff if he saw something unusual.

That same night, I decided to apologize to him through phone. I was having second thoughts about calling him or texting him. Then I went for text. When I was in the middle of the text, I decided to call him. I was kinda shaky and all. I went to the second floor garage so that no one would hear me, because they were all inside the house. I searched for his name, then pressed the call button. I put it on my ear and nervously waited for the ring and his voice.





























"The subscriber cannot be reached. Please try again later."

Before that, there was no ringing. Maybe he had his phone turned off. I tried about 5-7 times before giving up. Then I told myself that I would just go talk to him tomorrow morning.

And so I prepared my stuff, set my phone's alarm and went to sleep. I had a hard time falling asleep because I was kinda...excited o.o

I finally fell asleep. But then, I woke up. I thought it was already 5:30am. I noticed that it was too dark to be 5:30am. I checked the time on my phone beside me.

1:33am.

I was like, 'WTF. I am WAAY to excited.' Then I tried sleeping again, but had a really hard time in doing so. Finally, after 30-50 minutes[I think] of trying to fall asleep, I did.

Morning came. Usual morning routine. Service came, dropped me off, put my bag on the shoe rack, went to my locker to get my stuff and put it in my bag.

Then I waited. Waited. Waited. Then he finally came. I waited in the corridor by our section. I THOUGHT he was going to put his bag at the end near our classroom, but it was the opposite[I think their adviser told them to put their bags near the Faenza classroom.] So he went in front of the shoe rack in the corridor of his classroom, dropped his bag somewhere then went straight to Faenza because his friends were there.

I was a bit dismayed, but I just shrugged it off and told myself that I was going to try during recess.

Recess came. I ate, left the canteen and waited again in the corridor. Then our CLVE teacher came. Then I saw him walking from the locker, to faenza...

Before he even reached his classroom, our teacher already told us to go in. GAH. Missed again. Then I just told myself that I would do it during lunch, but the same thing happened. AAARRRRGH.

Then I told myself, during our training. So dismissal time came. I went to the CR to change into my sports attire. Then I went to the field, then we had a game. The set of games for first year boys with girls from all levels was different with the games of second to fourth year boys. So, when we had a game, they weren't playing. Then when THEY had the game, WE weren't playing. During my last game [which was after their first game, which was after OUR first game], I saw him sitting on the small goal, all alone. Then I told myself that I would approach him there. Then after a while, I saw some boys go near him and talk to him. GAH. Noooo. People! D:

*sigh* Then it was their game again, then training was finished. I went to the bathroom and changed. I was passing by Faenza then I saw Pillow there. It was dark and I only recognized him when he spoke. He told me that that I was his 'idol' because he told me I was good in defense. Then I reacted. "WEEEEEEEEEH?" Then he said "No really." Then I reacted "NGEEEEEEEEEE." So after that incident I thought to myself "Okay this is the last chance. When I see Pillow go out it means Clyde comes after."

So I went out of the corridors to the lobby and then outside. I waited for our service, and I wished that it'd be late. Then I sat and waited. It came after a while then I loaded my stuff in there. I went in and so did the rest of my service mates. We had to wait for the others. Then after about a minute of waiting, I saw Pillow then other guys then the last one of them was Clyde. Their service was probably 4 parking spaces away from ours. And so I was sitting there, and decided to get off and talk to him. But then my left foot hurt [Yeah. I almost sprained it during training. What happened was it was our throw in. I was the one to throw it. And so I threw it then people focused on the ball again. I hurriedly went inside the field again when suddenly, I didn't notice the...uhm..."sank part" of the field. It had bars. I dunno what they call it. Anyway, I stepped on it with my left foot then all my weight went to the three toes[pinky up] of my left foot. So what happened was I stepped on the sank part(running), then it hurt, then I used my right foot to step again on the field. I staggered. Gah. Anyway, back to the topic].

So I didn't talk to him today. Period. I wonder when the next chance will be? :\

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