In a dilemma: RELIGION and ART

Religion:

Dianne's dad YMed me yesterday night and we talked about this. He said at least they believe in Jesus. I can also keep my devotion to Mama Mary in secret. Anyway, I asked about what I should do. I told him that I listen to the priest in catholic mass while I don't listen to the pastor in sunday service. I think we use the same bible naman. Anyway, I'm okay with everything for now. But I'm still going to look for a Catholic Church.

Art:

BIG BIG DILEMMA. So yeah, it's about art. First of all, I have a new sketchpad that's 29.7cm x 42cm (A3 size) with 30 sheets in it. I wanna draw something, but first of all, I need INSPIRATION. Until April 12 I have no school, so no things to draw about. And Sunday service is only...on Sunday.[obviously. lol] Second, I don't know if I should draw anime or real people. My problem with that is, I still don't have enough skills to draw real people with correct proportions. I still need reference pictures for that. But if I use reference pictures, I won't be able to fully express myself and there'd be no originality anymore. And I don't wanna draw in anime form, because of all the wrong human proportions. And I'm also getting a bit tired of drawing anime, too.

So I told myself that I'd try Surrealism for a change. Because I think by that way, I'd be able to express myself more.

Have I ever told you that I don't like abstract art? I don't know why. But anyway, surrealism, in my opinion, has a little bit of abstract in it, don't you think? But that's just the way some people express themselves.

Or wait, I could try landscape painting. But it bores the hell of me. And so does still life.

*sigh* I'm stuck with doing portraits =w=

Hmm..

:|

Hmm... I feel like I'm going by some rules. But this is art! A way of self-expression! So why do I have to go by some rules?

Perhaps, it's because I think too much of what others might think of me.

Oh world. :|

I have to change my way of thinking. I've got to stop impressing people. *sigh* That's the problem with me.

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END.